I know better. I know I know better. Every mother in the world knows better.
When your kids are home and they are quiet, you're supposed to worry. It's in the handbook that you don't get when they are born.
"When I grow up, I want to be the guy who does this!" was what Michael would say before he knew the word "Scientist". He would mime pouring a substance from one beaker (or testing tube as he now says) to another.
"A chemist?" I ask.
"No! A mad scientist!" is now his standard response.
Knowing better, I bought him a science kit last weekend that contained beakers, an eye-dropper, 'testing' tubes and directions for a wide variety of experiments. It taught how to make play-dough, bubbles and a mini-volcano using vinegar and baking soda. -I know. Those of you who are smarter than I can already see where this is going.-
Fast forward to two nights ago.
I was on the computer caught up in that time-suck that is called FaceBook. All was fairly quiet. I could hear some rattling around in the kitchen, but not enough to really get my attention. Looking at the time, I realized that I had to get the lasagna in the oven.
As I rounded the corner to the kitchen, I heard a POP! Followed by a GASP! I'm still not sure whether the gasp was Michael's or mine.
There it was. Mad Scientist Experiment. All. Over. My. Kitchen.
Not only were the wrong proportions of vinegar to baking soda probably used, but I think the concoction was put into a beaker, capped and shaken. As if that wasn't enough, green food coloring was added to the mix.
There we stood. At dinner time. Everything dripping green fizzys. I took a deep breath. Michael started apologizing. I took another deep breath.
"I'm sure that we'll laugh about this someday. For now let's just get it cleaned up."
Soon, we had it all cleaned up. Cleaned up, that is, until I took the tray that Michael had carefully be conducting his experiment on (per my instructions of "Always work over the tray and that way messes will be much easier to clean up!") and turned to the sink to clean it up. At the same moment, Michael turned from the sink back toward me and we collided. The tray flew into the air and again, the kitchen was covered in fizzy green-ness.
The day of laughter was postponed.
As soon as I thought it was safe I sent Michael off to the shower to scrub the green off of himself!
When Michael came out of the shower, he said, "Mommy? Does food coloring stain?"
"I don't know, son. I would think it could."
"Well, I was thinking when I was in the shower. Isn't it lucky then that I was wearing a green shirt?"
Sigh.
Is it safe to laugh yet?
